...and after a week of sticky, stifling, sweat producing humidity, the rain feels really good.
It was a holiday today, Marine Day to be exact, and Arny had the day off from work. We took the opportunity to take a train ride out to Jed's school which is in an area call Chofu. Rose, the woman we were meeting, said it would take about an hour to get there. However, she didn't account for the fact she was talking to two people who were not yet train literate and would spend at least ten minutes at each station figuring out what train to take, what direction to take the train in and what ticket to buy. You see, there were three separate trains, on three separate train lines, each requiring it's own ticket. Luckily, we knew our shortcomings in this area and allowed two hours to get there.
The ride out was not eventful, except for the fact that I was obsessed with looking at all of the umbrellas. Some people even had two, one for the sun (if it ever came out) and one for the rain. There were fancy ones and plastic ones, ones that perfectly matched their owners outfits, some with little tassels on the end, some just plain. They all had the same thing in common though - they were all perfectly folded!!! I watched in awe as each person would enter the train, sit and proceed to methodically straighten each fold before wrapping the tag around to fully close it.
Once we got there, our next mystery is to figure out exactly where the school was. I knew it was up the road from a temple, but when we looked at the town map, we realized there were several temples. Oh, did I mention the further out of downtown Tokyo you are the less English is spoken or written? I spotted a sign with the school's name and we walked toward it. Unfortunately, right away we were faced with a choice - right or left, with no addition sign indicating the correct way to the school. We guessed and started walking. Unfortunately, we guessed wrong, so we stopped in a 7-11 (yes, that 7-11 - they are everywhere) and asked, assuming they would know. They did, but didn't speak a word of English. Amazingly and so very kindly, the woman behind the counter came running out and found a young girl who could speak English and she gave us directions. We were so grateful, not just for the directions, but to be a country that was so accommodating. It makes every day so much easier to be surrounded by people who want to help you.
We made our way across the railroad tracks towards the school, passing the temple on the way. It seemed like a nice neighborhood, but like everything we have seen so far, congested, just like Tokyo. No grass, just home after home, one right next to each other. A few minutes later, we reached the school. It looked like an embassy with a big gate and a guard who asked for ID (he asked Arny - not me - that 'wife' thing again) and then handed us each a visitor pass on a lanyard we had to hang around our neck.
The school looked pretty typical except for the Japanese garden area in the center of the three connecting buildings that make up the school. They have a huge art room and science lab as well as a fully loaded kitchen where they hold cooking classes. Perhaps we can convince Jed to take the class and then come home and make dinner to show us what he learned - it would be a win-win for everybody.
Tuesday, July 18, 2006
Monday, July 17, 2006
It's That Time Again
Oh yes, the period between the time the referral rumors start coming out and the actual referrals. It is a time where formerly normal and calm people (like me) become obsessed with any bit of information they can get their hands on. There is actually an entire blog devoted to these rumors. "The China Center for Adoption Affairs" (the government office that is in charge of international adoption and the one who matches the children to the parents) is moving", "The CCAA already moved", "they are going up to July 13", "the wait is going up to 18 months" -it's enough to give you a headache.
Our dossier was logged in on July 27, which means, if the above rumor is correct, we will not be getting our referral this month. Not that I really expected it.
Want it- yes.
Crave it - yes.
Wish for it - yes.
Yearn for it with all of my motherness - yes.
Expect it - no.
This very long process has taught me patience for things that I have no control over. To look at the positive aspect of the wait - we will be settled in our permanent apartment, Arny will be able to take more time off work, it will not be so hot and humid in China.
Right now my child seems very far away - although everywhere I am, I imagine how it will be with her. The subways will be a problem with a stroller - many stairs and escalators. There are little playgrounds tucked into corners of buildings and small parks. The sidewalks are uneven and start and stop for no reason. I will have to be careful.
Arny and I went to the grocery store yesterday and I mentioned with an escalator and stairs as the point of entry, a stroller would be very difficult to maneuver here. He suggested I bring the baby to his office and while I shopped, he would strap the baby into the hip carrier and work until I got back. The offer was only good for grocery shopping - not going to the spa.
Poo!!!
Our dossier was logged in on July 27, which means, if the above rumor is correct, we will not be getting our referral this month. Not that I really expected it.
Want it- yes.
Crave it - yes.
Wish for it - yes.
Yearn for it with all of my motherness - yes.
Expect it - no.
This very long process has taught me patience for things that I have no control over. To look at the positive aspect of the wait - we will be settled in our permanent apartment, Arny will be able to take more time off work, it will not be so hot and humid in China.
Right now my child seems very far away - although everywhere I am, I imagine how it will be with her. The subways will be a problem with a stroller - many stairs and escalators. There are little playgrounds tucked into corners of buildings and small parks. The sidewalks are uneven and start and stop for no reason. I will have to be careful.
Arny and I went to the grocery store yesterday and I mentioned with an escalator and stairs as the point of entry, a stroller would be very difficult to maneuver here. He suggested I bring the baby to his office and while I shopped, he would strap the baby into the hip carrier and work until I got back. The offer was only good for grocery shopping - not going to the spa.
Poo!!!
Saturday, July 15, 2006
The Umbrella
I have discovered two entirely new fashion accessories - the umbrella and washcloth/towel. I spent hours in three different department stores (more on this later) investigating the various kinds and in the process embarrassed myself and my entire culture.
Woman of all ages carry umbrellas to shield themselves from the sun as everyone, men and women alike, have an aversion to wearing sunglasses. This sun, coupled with the humidity, makes you sweat - a lot - hence the need for small washcloths or towels. After having spent several days walking around in the sun and humidity, the need for these items became evident.
I ventured into Ginza, the major shopping area and where the famous scene from "Lost in Translation" was filmed, to investigate the infamous Tokyo department stores and find myself a sun umbrella. While this area of Tokyo has many department stores to choose from, I concentrated on the three "M"s - Matsuya, Matsuzakaya and Mitsukoshi. All three are seven or eight stories high and filled with more stuff than you can imagine in the most random way. Children's clothes next to golf gear next to Kimonos. Each store has an entire area devoted to aprons, something I have never seen in the US.
The basement level is one big food market. There are little booths set up with every kind of food imaginable; all kinds of fish, grilled food, various kinds of desserts - I even saw one that sold bagels. The most amusing display though was usually on one of the top floors. This was where the food basket displays were. In Tokyo department stores, you can send your friends and family all kinds of gift baskets; from meat, fish and desserts to beer and juice. They actually had baskets filled with a dozen cans of ordinary beer and bottles of juice you could find in any grocery store. I stood there trying to imagine any circumstance where I would find this a good idea, as opposed to going to a grocery store and buying a six pack. Perhaps it is due to the Japanese skill in wrapping and presentation. Instead of pulling a six pack out of a paper bag, you can present it skillfully arranged in a basket with a bow.
But I digress - let's get back to the umbrellas and little towels. Each store also has an Umbrella section, usually on the first floor next to the little towel section. There you will find all kinds of umbrellas from all the major designers, some costing over $100. They coordinate with the little towels, also by designers - who knew Ralph Lauren and Lulu Guinness could do little towels and umbrellas? I realized immediately that I would be overwhelmed trying to decide on both an umbrella and a little towel in one day, so I stuck to the umbrella purchase.
Since there was a sale on, there were swarms of Japanese women huddled around the display, opening and closing each umbrella with a skill that must have taken years to develop. This is exactly the opposite of the U.S., where people open and close their umbrellas without a thought, the material being squished into whatever shape it takes as we wrap the thin strip of material around as fast as we can until the snaps meet. This is completely unacceptable in Japan. Closing the umbrella is an art, one that takes time as each woman gently folds her umbrella, taking care to return each fold of fabric back to its original shape. The large umbrellas are easy - it was the folding umbrellas that proved impossible, even as I observed both customers and saleswomen expertly folding theirs. I was getting disapproving looks(very polite disapproving looks) as I tried and failed miserably, my folded umbrella looking abused and very un-Japanese like. Perhaps in addition to the language lessons I will be taking soon, there is a class in umbrella folding I can take as well. I did buy an umbrella, which the salesperson took time to refold appropriately. When I returned to the apartment, I again made the attempt to fold my umbrella properly, but alas, my lovely little umbrella sits in a squished up pile on the table.
How sad.
Woman of all ages carry umbrellas to shield themselves from the sun as everyone, men and women alike, have an aversion to wearing sunglasses. This sun, coupled with the humidity, makes you sweat - a lot - hence the need for small washcloths or towels. After having spent several days walking around in the sun and humidity, the need for these items became evident.
I ventured into Ginza, the major shopping area and where the famous scene from "Lost in Translation" was filmed, to investigate the infamous Tokyo department stores and find myself a sun umbrella. While this area of Tokyo has many department stores to choose from, I concentrated on the three "M"s - Matsuya, Matsuzakaya and Mitsukoshi. All three are seven or eight stories high and filled with more stuff than you can imagine in the most random way. Children's clothes next to golf gear next to Kimonos. Each store has an entire area devoted to aprons, something I have never seen in the US.
The basement level is one big food market. There are little booths set up with every kind of food imaginable; all kinds of fish, grilled food, various kinds of desserts - I even saw one that sold bagels. The most amusing display though was usually on one of the top floors. This was where the food basket displays were. In Tokyo department stores, you can send your friends and family all kinds of gift baskets; from meat, fish and desserts to beer and juice. They actually had baskets filled with a dozen cans of ordinary beer and bottles of juice you could find in any grocery store. I stood there trying to imagine any circumstance where I would find this a good idea, as opposed to going to a grocery store and buying a six pack. Perhaps it is due to the Japanese skill in wrapping and presentation. Instead of pulling a six pack out of a paper bag, you can present it skillfully arranged in a basket with a bow.
But I digress - let's get back to the umbrellas and little towels. Each store also has an Umbrella section, usually on the first floor next to the little towel section. There you will find all kinds of umbrellas from all the major designers, some costing over $100. They coordinate with the little towels, also by designers - who knew Ralph Lauren and Lulu Guinness could do little towels and umbrellas? I realized immediately that I would be overwhelmed trying to decide on both an umbrella and a little towel in one day, so I stuck to the umbrella purchase.
Since there was a sale on, there were swarms of Japanese women huddled around the display, opening and closing each umbrella with a skill that must have taken years to develop. This is exactly the opposite of the U.S., where people open and close their umbrellas without a thought, the material being squished into whatever shape it takes as we wrap the thin strip of material around as fast as we can until the snaps meet. This is completely unacceptable in Japan. Closing the umbrella is an art, one that takes time as each woman gently folds her umbrella, taking care to return each fold of fabric back to its original shape. The large umbrellas are easy - it was the folding umbrellas that proved impossible, even as I observed both customers and saleswomen expertly folding theirs. I was getting disapproving looks(very polite disapproving looks) as I tried and failed miserably, my folded umbrella looking abused and very un-Japanese like. Perhaps in addition to the language lessons I will be taking soon, there is a class in umbrella folding I can take as well. I did buy an umbrella, which the salesperson took time to refold appropriately. When I returned to the apartment, I again made the attempt to fold my umbrella properly, but alas, my lovely little umbrella sits in a squished up pile on the table.
How sad.
Friday, July 14, 2006
Ignorance is Bliss
One thing I have noticed since being here is a suprising calmness in not knowing what is going on around me and the fun I am having figuring things out. Not speaking more than a few words of Japanese means that I am in a bit of a vacuum when it comes to communication. For example, in the grocery store yesterday, the checkout woman cheerfully said many words to me. Being the polite person I am supposed to be in Japan, my response was simply to shake my head and smile, not understanding a word of what she was saying. She then proceeded to take my things out of the little hand cart and ring it up, placing it gently into another little hand cart. When finished, she placed three plastic bags in the cart along with my purchases. I looked around wondering what to do. Do I get to take the little hand cart home with me? Perhaps I pack up my groceries myself, but where? In front of the checkout counters there is a shelf where people go after they pay. For some, this is for heating up the prepared food they have just purchased as there are microwaves lining the walls above. For me, it was the place I was supposed to stand and pack up my things into the plastic bags. Ah ha!!
Another area where I am blissfully enjoying my ignorance is in reading labels. I am a fairly health conscious person - not obsessing, but checking out labels for the least amount of additives, sugar, salt, etc. No luck here, because all of the labels look like this:
So, no more reading labels for me!! I figure since Japanese people have the highest life expectancy of anyone, they must be doing something right.
Speaking of food, this is Arny turning on the oven for the first time:
In his hand is one of the very valuable instruction sheets we have lying around the apartment. It is a combination oven and microwave and you have to push the right button or you nuke whatever it is you want to cook, or visa versa.
Coming soon - the answers to many of your "toilet" questions - the mystery of all of those mysterious buttons is being solved as I write...
Another area where I am blissfully enjoying my ignorance is in reading labels. I am a fairly health conscious person - not obsessing, but checking out labels for the least amount of additives, sugar, salt, etc. No luck here, because all of the labels look like this:
So, no more reading labels for me!! I figure since Japanese people have the highest life expectancy of anyone, they must be doing something right.
Speaking of food, this is Arny turning on the oven for the first time:
In his hand is one of the very valuable instruction sheets we have lying around the apartment. It is a combination oven and microwave and you have to push the right button or you nuke whatever it is you want to cook, or visa versa.
Coming soon - the answers to many of your "toilet" questions - the mystery of all of those mysterious buttons is being solved as I write...
Wednesday, July 12, 2006
A Day Later and Not So Many Yen
This morning I went to a Japanese grocery store called Pororoca. It is an escalator ride down from street level in the basement of an office building. Upon entering, you walk through a 100 yen store (yes, just like the dollar stores back home), then pass a dry cleaners and then comes the market. The prices were normal, except for the cantalope, which was still $15. While they carried a few recognizable things, Tropicana orange juice for example, most of the labels were entirely in Japanese. I bought what I am really sure is Salmon to make for dinner, what I am confident is yoghurt and several other things I absolutely knew what they were, like the sushi I bought for lunch.
Experienced my first yoga class - mmmmm, how do you say Namaste in Japanese??
Experienced my first yoga class - mmmmm, how do you say Namaste in Japanese??
Tuesday, July 11, 2006
Out and About
Food
Yes, food shopping here is expensive. Especially if you go to one of the several "International Supermarkets", which carry many items ex-pats can't seem to do without. Saw $15 cantalopes, $22 bottles of Tide detergent, $7 containers of blueberries, $9 boxes of Ziploc bags and poor Tess - she will no longer be eating Science Diet dog food when she arrives because it costs $16 a bag. Japanese items are not expensive, so if you can figure out exactly what you are buying you can do well. Surprisingly, there are some american foods that are not expensive....Jed, unlike Tess, your primary food source, Ritz crackers, are available at a normal price.
Subways
Intimidating, but brilliant once you get the hang of it. Thanks to my friend Jan, I learned that the entire system is coordinated and by looking at the subway map, you can determine what car to get into in order to get out at the correct exit for whereever it is you are going. Just like in New York, there are many entrances to each subway station. But unlike New York, you can figure how to get closest to where you need to be by looking at the signs in the subway. Each exit is numbered. You simply you get in the car with the same number. How is that possible, you wonder? Each subway car is numbered and the platform is numbered. When the subway enters the station and stops, the cars are automatically alligned with the numbers on the platform. When you get to where you are going, there are large signs listing major buildings, stores, monuments and the correct exit. And the best part? It is in English!!
Children
They are adorable. And, very little ones about 6 or 7 are on the trains by themselves. Again, thanks to Jan, I found out that as part of the education system here, children are required to take public transportation to school. Given the fact the city is so safe, kids go by themselves. And they wear really cute little uniforms too.
Yes, food shopping here is expensive. Especially if you go to one of the several "International Supermarkets", which carry many items ex-pats can't seem to do without. Saw $15 cantalopes, $22 bottles of Tide detergent, $7 containers of blueberries, $9 boxes of Ziploc bags and poor Tess - she will no longer be eating Science Diet dog food when she arrives because it costs $16 a bag. Japanese items are not expensive, so if you can figure out exactly what you are buying you can do well. Surprisingly, there are some american foods that are not expensive....Jed, unlike Tess, your primary food source, Ritz crackers, are available at a normal price.
Subways
Intimidating, but brilliant once you get the hang of it. Thanks to my friend Jan, I learned that the entire system is coordinated and by looking at the subway map, you can determine what car to get into in order to get out at the correct exit for whereever it is you are going. Just like in New York, there are many entrances to each subway station. But unlike New York, you can figure how to get closest to where you need to be by looking at the signs in the subway. Each exit is numbered. You simply you get in the car with the same number. How is that possible, you wonder? Each subway car is numbered and the platform is numbered. When the subway enters the station and stops, the cars are automatically alligned with the numbers on the platform. When you get to where you are going, there are large signs listing major buildings, stores, monuments and the correct exit. And the best part? It is in English!!
Children
They are adorable. And, very little ones about 6 or 7 are on the trains by themselves. Again, thanks to Jan, I found out that as part of the education system here, children are required to take public transportation to school. Given the fact the city is so safe, kids go by themselves. And they wear really cute little uniforms too.
Monday, July 10, 2006
First Day
Today, my first full day in Tokyo started with a chore. Well, not exactly. I was up at 3am and since nothing is open at that hour, I passed the time unpacking and reading the instructions for all of the appliances. Well, everything except for the toilet. You see, everything is written in Japanese, so I had to read the english directions for the dishwasher, television, telephone and iron. I felt like I was an alien on a different planet for the first time.
Speaking of aliens, since we will be in Tokyo for more than 90 days, I had to register my alien-ness at the local Minatu-ku (area in Tokyo where we are) ward office. The offical name for what I needed is an Alien Registration Certificate. After getting a map and directions from the consierge downstairs, I set off on foot for the estimated 20 minute walk. I was proud of myself for not getting lost and arriving on time. The lovely woman taking care of me must have said thank you a dozen or more times. "Thank you for showing me your passport", "thank you for filling out the form", "thank you for giving me your husband's name", "thank you", "thank you", "thank you". I must say, the New York postal employees could use a lesson in dealing with the public from this kind woman.
In addition to the alien registration certificate, I had to get another document saying I had applied for an alien registration certificate in order to get a cellphone. I don't know why, but that's what I needed so I asked the kind woman at the office for that as well and she thanked me for asking.
Mission accomplished and feeling very cocky at having made it there without getting lost, I promptly did exactly that on the way back. After a brief stop at a beautiful temple, I should have turned and didn't and ended up in a rather tacky part of Tokyo. Realizing I had made a mistake, I turned around and following the map, made my way back. By this time, the sun was starting to peak out and the humidity was rather stifling. By the time I got back to the apartment, I was dripping wet. Here are some pictures of my day......
Speaking of aliens, since we will be in Tokyo for more than 90 days, I had to register my alien-ness at the local Minatu-ku (area in Tokyo where we are) ward office. The offical name for what I needed is an Alien Registration Certificate. After getting a map and directions from the consierge downstairs, I set off on foot for the estimated 20 minute walk. I was proud of myself for not getting lost and arriving on time. The lovely woman taking care of me must have said thank you a dozen or more times. "Thank you for showing me your passport", "thank you for filling out the form", "thank you for giving me your husband's name", "thank you", "thank you", "thank you". I must say, the New York postal employees could use a lesson in dealing with the public from this kind woman.
In addition to the alien registration certificate, I had to get another document saying I had applied for an alien registration certificate in order to get a cellphone. I don't know why, but that's what I needed so I asked the kind woman at the office for that as well and she thanked me for asking.
Mission accomplished and feeling very cocky at having made it there without getting lost, I promptly did exactly that on the way back. After a brief stop at a beautiful temple, I should have turned and didn't and ended up in a rather tacky part of Tokyo. Realizing I had made a mistake, I turned around and following the map, made my way back. By this time, the sun was starting to peak out and the humidity was rather stifling. By the time I got back to the apartment, I was dripping wet. Here are some pictures of my day......
Ohayo from Tokyo
This is our toilet - I have no idea what those little buttons mean, and it will probably take me awhile to figure it out because while there are printed instructions on how to use just about everything in the apartment, there are no toilet instructions.
On the other hand, in the bathroom at the airport, which had a similar toilet, there were signs in English that explained everything. While using said toilet, I saw a button that said "Flushing Sound". I didn't see an actual handle, so I figured it to be the flusher. I was wrong. It was literally the sound of a flushing toilet - I suppose for those people who had potty training issues and forever need the sound of running water to go.
So there I am listening to the sound of a flushing toilet, wondering 1) how to make it stop, and 2) how to actually flush the toilet, praying no one came in and saw me, the silly American, playing with the "funny buttons" on the seat. I did finally find the handle and now I was listening to the real flush and the recorded flush, rushing to get out of the bathroom with two very heavy carry on bags, when a couple of Japanese women came in to the bathroom. I smiled politely and ran.....
Note to Michelle and Lori - same bathroom had a "child holder" in the stall. It was a little seat up against the wall, kind of like a highchair that you put your baby in while you go.....very convenient.
Monday, July 03, 2006
Arny's View of Tokyo
Banking Adventures
"I opened a bank account. I can get you a duplicate cash (ATM) card so you can access the account also, but you will need to be here and have the form that says you have applied for the alien registration card.
(got slightly lost trying to find the subway station to go to the bank- finally get to the branch, and its closed. Get on the ATM
phone, and complain that Website said they were open on Saturday -
find out the open office is 1/2 block away, so go there and open the
account. When I mention giving my wife a cash card on the account,
the account officer (a woman) asks me 'do you trust her?')"
NOTE: In Japan, joint bank accounts do not exist. The husband opens the account in his name and gives access to his wife.
Shopping Adventures
"Went to market and made dinner in the apartment - had to guess
what the salad dressing was (in fact had to guess that it was in fact
salad dressing at all) but it was, and was vaguely Italian. (not bad)
Could not for the life of me find rice in the supermarket, and could
not summon the courage to ask.
I also bought what I think is laundry detergent - we have a
combination washer-dryer in the apartment."
Street Signs
"You will see some very funny signs here. My favorite so far is in the plaza next to the apartment, every 20 feet or so is a sign which says "No Peeing" in both Enlish and Japanese."
"I opened a bank account. I can get you a duplicate cash (ATM) card so you can access the account also, but you will need to be here and have the form that says you have applied for the alien registration card.
(got slightly lost trying to find the subway station to go to the bank- finally get to the branch, and its closed. Get on the ATM
phone, and complain that Website said they were open on Saturday -
find out the open office is 1/2 block away, so go there and open the
account. When I mention giving my wife a cash card on the account,
the account officer (a woman) asks me 'do you trust her?')"
NOTE: In Japan, joint bank accounts do not exist. The husband opens the account in his name and gives access to his wife.
Shopping Adventures
"Went to market and made dinner in the apartment - had to guess
what the salad dressing was (in fact had to guess that it was in fact
salad dressing at all) but it was, and was vaguely Italian. (not bad)
Could not for the life of me find rice in the supermarket, and could
not summon the courage to ask.
I also bought what I think is laundry detergent - we have a
combination washer-dryer in the apartment."
Street Signs
"You will see some very funny signs here. My favorite so far is in the plaza next to the apartment, every 20 feet or so is a sign which says "No Peeing" in both Enlish and Japanese."
Saturday, July 01, 2006
In Between
Driving away from the apartment on Thursday night, it dawned on me that for the next ten days, I will be in-between. In between my old life in New York and my new one in Tokyo. I will be traveling to Florida and back to New York, depending on friends and family to provide me with the comforts of home because for the next ten days, I won't have one.
It was so strange seeing all of our stuff being loaded into that 20 foot container - my whole life in this solid rectangle of metal, being shipping halfway around the world. Will it all fit in the new apartment? Should it all fit in the new apartment?
Deciding what to take was hard given we have no idea what our new home will look like - we took enough to create the familiarity of home, but left room to add what will hopefully be familiar soon. The only thing I do know is that while Tess will be residing at the Biblowitz-Warmflash home until the holidays, her hair will be traveling to Tokyo because as anyone with a pug knows, you can leave the dog behind, but never the hair!!
It was so strange seeing all of our stuff being loaded into that 20 foot container - my whole life in this solid rectangle of metal, being shipping halfway around the world. Will it all fit in the new apartment? Should it all fit in the new apartment?
Deciding what to take was hard given we have no idea what our new home will look like - we took enough to create the familiarity of home, but left room to add what will hopefully be familiar soon. The only thing I do know is that while Tess will be residing at the Biblowitz-Warmflash home until the holidays, her hair will be traveling to Tokyo because as anyone with a pug knows, you can leave the dog behind, but never the hair!!
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