Note To Self

1) While absolutely gorgeous, my daughter has some issues with personal hygiene - does not like baths. No, why be coy about it - she despises baths - starts shrieking at the sight of the water and will not stop until she is safely in the towel and out of the bathroom. Same for teeth brushing, without the screams. Just shuts her cute little mouth shut with all the strength she has.

2) Doctor visits will be an issue. While at the exam needed for the consulate, she howled, threw herself around and basically made every other parent waiting grateful she wasn't theirs. She even made me cry.

3) Never, ever, ever wake my daughter from a nap. She does not like it and will make that fact known to everyone on the very small bus we took to the Buddhist Temple.

But other that that, she is a total and complete joy.

Daddy's Little Girl

Just because baba-san isn't here doesn't mean his presence is forgotten. Ariana displayed a very intense interest in the calculator at the pearl store earlier today, practically grabbing it out of the saleswoman's grasp and it took awhile before she relinquished it:

After a sumptuous buffet breakfast on the 2nd floor of the hotel:


we all met to do the paperwork that makes up the American portion of the adoption - basically to get her into the U.S. Ariana amused herself with raisins, which she either 1) ate whole 2) took little bites of, or 3) threw down as not worthy.

We also took a walk down the streets around the White Swan, a quaint and quiet area compared to the center of town. We bought the first of many pairs of shoes - for Ariana - they are about $3-4 a pair, so there is absolutely no guilt involved.

Dinner tonight was with some of the group at a Thai restaurant where Ariana dined with her own little fork on a mango milkshake, pumpkin sticks, chicken,noodles, lamb and chocolate ice cream. Now, a good portion of all of the above ended up in places other than her mouth (her lap, the chair, the floor) but enough got into her mouth that I am sure she is not starving.

and finally, the smile.....

which came from tickling her tummy and almost made me cry...OK, so it did make me cry, I admit it...

Proud Mama

Can I just say what a smart, sweet, lovely, brilliant, adorable, well mannered and beautiful child I have? She is......now you may ask what sparked this outpouring of compliments. Well, today was our first plane ride and her first day without baba-san and big brother. We all got up very early and the guys left around 7am. I was really panicked that things would go swiftly downhill. But no. Not just no, but a resounding NO!!! She was brilliant. She ate, she let me change her diaper with not a peep and was calm, cool and collected on the plane; eating, drinking and playing with her book. She even got up to stretch her legs and played with "uncle" Jan for awhile.



She came right back to me though for the touchdown and was only slightly grouchy waiting to check in. Finally in our room, she has been sitting on the bed amusing herself for a couple of hours now and I have spent a couple of hours just staring at my beautiful, smart, cute, adorable child.



Oh and she smiled a big smile when she saw herself in the mirror in her little book and she has been babbling and saying definite words!!!

some two fisted eating action last night at dinner...notice the utencils in her cute little hands....
Today she dined on hamburger and little crackers in bed.....
This is the view from our hotel room...

to be continued....

Just a Quick Note

Tonight is our final night in Nanchang and my final night with the boys. Arny and Jed leave tomorrow for Tokyo as Jed has school and preparation for finals.

We had a group dinner at the wonderful restaurant around the corner and celebrated all of our accomplishments and joy. We leave early tomorrow for Guangzhou and the U.S. portion of the adoption. Basically, just more paperwork. Ariana has her Chinese passport and will be ready to go once she gets the visa at the U.S. consulate. I am looking forward to leaving Nanchang and getting on with the process.

But, I am terrified at the prospect of having all of the responsibility in Guangzhou. Husband-san makes a wonderful teammate in this parenting game and his presence will be sorely missed. And Jed in turning into a terrific big brother.

Our little girl is showing herself alittle each day and it is so exciting to see. She actually let us put her down in her crib tonight, on the third try. Perhaps she is feeling more secure.

Some memories of Nanchang: the rooster alarm clock, the dog meat on the menu in the hotel dining room, the women on the street who chastise us for not covering up our babies enough; people cooking their lunch in front of their stores; the people who look at us with such intense interest. Most of all, it is the place where we were united with the most amazing child, one I hope you will all meet very soon.

I will try my best to write in Nanchang, however with a two year old alone, I'm not sure just how much I'll get done..

the adventure continues.................

More Pictures...

More Pictures

She Likes Me, She Really Likes Me!!!!

She finally figured out I wasn't so bad and we are now pals; at least most of the time. Boy, does this feel good!! It's amazing how I start to go through withdrawal if I haven't held her for awhile. Well, yesterday I held her for most of the day - she cried every time I tried to put her down.

We went sightseeing and had lunch in the hotel - her first taste of pizza and she liked it!

Towards the end of the day, she wanted her daddy, so he got the feeding chores, this time some shrimp.












Between the need to be held all the time, we are starting to get a little glimpse of her personality - she is coming out of her shell and starting to investigate her toys. It is slow going, but she has been through a tremendous change and is actually doing quite well. She has a little cold, which is causing a lot of sniffles and a bloody nose because of all of the congestion and rubbing...more sucking action (causing more screaming) is in order...yuck!!

Update Part 2

Well, after an early morning bonding session (from about 6 - 9am) where she would not let go of me or let me put her down for part of the time and basically was pretty pleased with me, she has returned to her "get away from me you scary person" mood.

She woke up early and I picked her up from her crib - she was fine and I just held her for a long time. We laid down on the bed together - her lying on top of me. She said "mam" in this little soft voice. She slept for a little while. She started to get restless again so we got up and walked, and sat, and walked some more. We went into the kitchen where she found the little packets of butter in the fridge and drank two bottles of milk (yes!!!). We went and sat in the bathroom, where we played with stuff and I used the little aspirator on her nose to suction out some of the gunk (ok, that is just gross!!) As a side note: yesterday when she was standing next to Baba san's side of the bed, she was picking her nose and then wiping it on the sheet - I thought this was hysterical; he was not happy.

Then we went and sat on the chair and almost fell asleep. When I tried to put her down, she suddenly woke up and kind of snapped, realizing it was me. Fun time over. She started screaming "mama", "mama" as if she was looking for someone and that's when it dawned on me.

After seeing her former caregivers yesterday, one of whom she likely thought of as her mama, she is just not ready to accept me as that yet. So, for now, Baba san and Jed are taking over:


Jed got right down to important business by letting her watch a James Bond movie followed by "Aquateen Hunger Force" with him while Arny takes a shower. From the look of it, she is quite enthralled - I will continue to provide her food and they will refer to me as "mama".

Thank you all for your kind words and support, both here and via email. I appreciate you all taking the time to share your experience and it does help tremendously. Feel free to continue to do so either here or by email - I am reading them all.

stay tuned.......................

Ok, Michelle - here is your update

The day started out well....we were friends......we got dressed, we ate breakfast and made out way downstairs and outside for the trip to the Civil Affairs office to complete the adoption.

The nannies from the orphanage were there and all gathered around Ariana to say hello. They kept pointing to me saying "Mama, Mama". That's when the trouble started....I went to pick her up and she started crying..Arny took her from me and from then on, I can't get near her. I tried holding her for awhile and she just cried. I thought perhaps she was just grieving, but she stopped as soon as Arny took her from me. I went out to the store and when I came back she was sleeping. When she woke up she saw me and started howling (welcome to motherhood!!) Arny took her and she stopped. Then, as you can see, they fell asleep peacefully. Everyone woke up to get ready to go out, but as I was trying to dress her she was crying so hysterically, I left without husband san or Ariana. I did what every self respecting mother does when shunned by their children...I went shopping!! To Walmart of all places to buy some more diapers and other assorted things. I'm back now and she is staring at me as she walks by really fast. At least she is not braking out in hysterics anymore.

This is actually a very normal reaction in adoption. The children will attach to one parent or the other. I know this in my head and I know it won't last.

But it's my heart that is hurting right now.

Crib Is Occupied

While most kids take about 17 years to hate their mothers, I achieved that feat in all of 3 minutes!! For awhile anyway. Once she realized she was being held by someone other than her nanny, she displayed the full range of a most heathy set of lungs that only stopped when Daddy san stepped in

See how calm and quiet she looks holding her little stuffed animal....




After an absolutely disasterous picture session, we made it back to the hotel where Jed and Daddy san undressed her. She was reluctant to let go of the shoes however (just like her mamma) so they left them on for awhile.
She spent about thirty minutes walking back and forth from the bathroom to the kitchen, exploring everything.

Finally it was time for a diaper change, which I am proud to say I did beautifully.


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